5/14/10--one month tomorrow

So. I keep staring at the calendar and seeing that day approaching. The 15th. Tomorrow at 2:45 pm will be exactly one month to the minute that I received the devastating call about our friend Steve. It just keeps going over and over in my mind. I can't believe it will be a month in less than 24 hours that he has been gone.

This past month has really shown us all how much Steve really meant to so many people. He touched so many lives during his short life--brought so many smiles and so much laughter. Every time Tim's phone rings I expect it to be Steve--calling about sports or asking what we're up to. I keep seeing him around town, catching glimpses of him here and there.



I go back to the morning of my wedding quite often in my head. It was storming like crazy and though I was about to begin the happiest day of my life, I felt myself quite sad. I was the only person awake in the house, so I went to sit out on my front porch and listen to the rain. I kept thinking about Steve and worrying about Tim. Why did this have to happen? The rain briefly stopped and an overwhelming calmness washed over my body. I knew at the instant, that though our friend was not with us physically, he'd be there with us in every other way. The calm lasted the rest of the day and into the night. Thank you for the calm Steve. It was a calm only you could bring.



About a week after the wedding, I finally got a chance to sit down and watch the video of the wedding ceremony. This may sound cheesy to some of you--and maybe it is...but I still get goosebumps thinking about it. After the storms, the sun came out and April 24 turned out to be a gorgeous spring day. The sun was blaring through the stained glass windows, our spirits were high. Watching the video, I noticed a blue light shooting from the ceiling to the floor, to the spot where Steve would be standing. I know it was just a reflection caused by the stained glass windows--but my heart and spirit believe that was Steve telling us he was there with us.



One month of many months. Always loved, never forgotten. RSJ.



Just so this is not a completely depressing post, here is another shot from our wedding. It's me and Tim during our first dance.

throw me somethin' mista!

Ah...the season is among us.

My friend, Allison, writes on Facebook:

"If I close my eyes really tight, I can imagine the smell of beignets, king cakes and jambalaya. I can imagine the sounds of horns and drums and the floats whistling by. I can imagine the sight of purple, yellow, green...I can imagine the feel of catching beads with my bare hands. Oh Fat Tuesday! How I wish I was in Mardi Gras Land!"

(Though I'm willing to bet that most revelers will welcome this solemn time--as they (we) have been going NON-STOP since the PLAYOFFS started!!!)

So--while I prepare for the next 40 days of reflection, today I take a step back and enjoy the true joys in my life--my beautiful fiance, my wonderful family, my great friends and LOTS of meats (man, I'm going to miss you steak!!)...

I leave you with this: Laissez les bon temps rouler!!

How I wish I was down there..."THROW ME SOMETHIN' MISTA!!!"

the shack

In an earlier post, I mentioned how I was getting emails from a Bible study group in another state. I shared with you all the beautiful poem that was included in the email and also, that I thought, maybe there was a particular reason I was receiving these emails. The messages were beautiful and seemed to speak directly to my heart.

Well, I have experienced that yet again, but this time, by way of a book.

I LOVE to blog hop and I follow quite a few blogs. I've noticed that several bloggers have mentioned this particular book but I didn't put much thought in it until my mother started reading it. Then, my sister read it. They both told me how amazing it was.

Then I started noticing the very different types of people reading this book and the message that each individual took away from it. For example, a grieving mother took away from the book that her loss is not a result of something she did personally, and that her Father is still there, carrying her in the tragic times. Another person took away that our imagination is a great thing, yet we need wisdom to know how to use it.

I personally gained so much from reading this book. These words (written by the author) sum it up for me: Most of us have our own grief, broken dreams and damaged hearts, each of us with our unique losses, our own 'shack.' I pray that you find the same grace there that I did, and that the abiding presence of Papa, Jesus and Sarayu will fill up your inside emptiness with joy unspeakable and full of glory.

This book gives a powerful glimpse into the nature of our God--that unfortunately, is all too often ignored in this day and age.

I HIGHLY recommend reading this book. It is called "The Shack" and is written by Wm. Paul Young. You can check out the website at www.theshackbook.com.

Summary (found on back of book):
Mackenzie Allen Phillip's youngest daughter, Missy, has been abducted during a family vacation and evidence that she may have been brutally murdered is found in an abandoned shack deep in the Oregon wilderness. Four years later, in the midst of his Great Sadness, Mack receives a suspicious note, apparently from God, inviting him back to that shack for a weekend.

Against his better judgement he arrives at the shack on a wintry afternoon and walks back into his darkest nightmare. What he finds there will change Mack's world forever.

In a world where religion seems to grow increasingly irrelevant THE SHACK wrestles with the timeless question: Where is God in a world so filled with unspeakable pain? The answers Mack gets will astound you and perhaps transform you as much as it did him.

A Quiet Weekend

After all the excitement and adventure of last weekend...I'm hibernating in my house this weekend with my pups. Tim has been in Dallas since Wednesday night and we miss him terribly! Fortunately, he's coming home tomorrow (woo hoo!!).

For Christmas my parents got me a photo editing program. It's been so long since I've been trained on any program so I'm kind of re-teaching myself. I am working on editing photos for Tim's and my "Third Year" book and started messing around with Tyson pictures.

This is the original:

This is the edited version...I'm not really sure what I did with it, I was just messing with different options. I have a great model, though...don't I?

I'm going to watch some of my "pointless" tv and go to bed! I'm loving this evening of doing nothing!